Simon trying to talk his way out of getting his fingernails trimmed.
Simon: Now that they’re clean, I think that takes away some of the need to trim them.
Me: ha-ha ha-ha, I don’t think so.
Simon: Well, I think the only reason it hurt you when I touched your skin with them is because of your old skin.
Me: No, you scratched the crap out of me. It’s nothing to do with old skin.
Simon: I’m serious, you’re middle aged. That’s the same thing as old. And old people’s skin is more sensitive.
Me: No, I’m young and pretty around you’re old and ugly.
Simon: No, you’re old and… Well…. Not ugly.